Today, I'm focusing on alone play time. Here's the synopsis:
Day 1: Told Baby Z it was special play time, made a big deal about the new fence. Baby Z was eager to set it up and quickly got inside. We piled in the toys and I set the timer for 15 minutes. He was excited and played for about 8 minutes and then realized he couldn't get out when he wanted. Crying for the next 7 minutes during which he dragged the entire play yard fence across the living room and reconfigured it into the space between a dining room chair and the wall. When I got him up I told him good job and reminded him that I wasn't disciplining him but it was a special time just for him.
Day 1 night: I reluctantly report the play yard experience to my husband who is anti-stuff and was skeptical of it working. He asks if I kept the receipt. I double-check.
Day 2: Again, repeated that we were doing the special play time for 15 minutes. Lots of toys, music playing. Baby Z played contentedly for the entire time, during which I cleaned the bathroom (yeah!). When time was up, I opened the play yard and he stayed in for a few more minutes.
Day 2 night: I (prematurely) report success to John and the rest of my family. But I don't throw away the box or the receipt.
...A few days in between....
Day 3: Alone play time in the afternoon this time, so I can get dinner started. Baby Z is extremely angry about this. Crying and screaming for 15 minutes (okay, maybe 13 minutes). Baby Z stomps his raisin bran snack into dust on the living room floor. The rest of the evening the slightest thing sets him off into a fit of crying. I spend a good portion of dinner-making time teaching him about self-control and disciplining him. He doesn't really calm down until I put him back in bed for 10 minutes or so. (Will have to post another time on temper tantrums. Sigh.)
Day 3 night: My husband sees the aftermath of the temper tantrum. I briefly mention in passing that the alone time set him off. We go out that night and I watch my husband take my toddler onto the beach. I think to myself that there won't be that many more times I get to see Baby Z hobbling his toddler walk alongside my husband. I resolve to enjoy as much as I can and not get too down about temper tantrums and crying fits.
Day 4: Alone play time in the afternoon again despite the thought that I could have a repeat of Day 3. I build it up lots and spend some time talking about which toys he wants in there with him. I put him in, turn on music and have been typing this blog entry since then. After about 20 minutes, I notice he is getting a little restless. I walk on over and tell him good job and "you did it!" We do a high five and then I open the play yard. Again, he doesn't immediately run out crying "Free at last!"
Day 4 night: Not sure I'll say anything to John until we've had a few more days of success. Still have the box. Still have the receipt.
To prove Baby Z is not always happy (although this was the other time he cried. ha.):
2 comments:
this post was very interesting. glad that it seems to be working. it reminded me of this post: http://www.preschoolersandpeace.com/?paged=2, called "playpen time."
Hang in there, D! I'm not sure what it looks like starting at 18 months but the play time will prove to be valuable once mastered. :) Tyler doesn't panic when he realizes I'm not around. Nowadays, he's been saying, "Mama? Where are you?" in a sing-song voice but continues to play with his toys or read his books. (This is while he is alone in our living room or in his room... We no longer use the play pen.) So hang in there with it - as we've talked about, you'll be glad you did. And so will Baby Z! :)
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