Congrajuashons

Today was Z's very last day of speech therapy play group. He graduated!! They do a re-evaluation after 5-6 months to see if the child needs to continue and he didn't! I am so thrilled at his ENORMOUS progress in speaking. I think back to where we were when we started and I'm blown away at how quickly he has learned so much. When we started he said a handful of two-word phrases and a few three-word phrases. Now, he is talking in full sentences all the time. He uses prepositions! He repeats things he hears (including an especially hilarious- "darn"). He "reads" books to himself. He is a full-blown talking toddler!

So in honor of Z's speaking Skeels, I'll just relate some of the more humorous things he has said.

> Drumming his fingers on his chin, as if stroking a beard: "Me finking sumping, Mama"
> Moon popped out, Mama!
> After I tell him one more minute before an activity ends, he says: "Mama, clock says five more minutes!"
> Me: "Are you finished (with a snack)?" Z: "Nope, steel eat-ing!"
> Five, Four, Free, Two, One....poockkk-chhh (Rocket taking off)
> Me: "Time for dinner! Come sit down." Z: "Me workeen sumping, Mama."

Congratulations, Z. I am so very proud of you.

Here's Z with a celebratory donut at Chit Chat Group today. He takes his pink icing seriously.

Next Step. Check.

I mentioned previously that the switch to a four hour feeding schedule was the next step for Harper. Unlike what I did with Z, I decided to drop the dream feed first with good result. Here we are only a few weeks later and I could tell Harper was getting close to the next step. My combination 3 1/2 to 4 hour schedule started to get more compacted toward the end of the day. I was having a hard time fitting in that last 8:30pm feeding because Harper was going longer and longer. Also, the 5:30pm feeding started to feel a little light- like she wasn't really that hungry; and that was when I was squeezing feedings a little closer together to fit them all in.

So here's a big difference between Babywise child number 1 and child number 2. With Z, I plotted and planned for weeks before switching his routine. I very carefully picked a mellow time when we would be home a lot to do it and prepared myself for the worst (lots of screaming). I was figuring I would do the same with Harper, but then yesterday I just decided to let her sleep and see if she made it. Worse case scenario was I would feed her a little late at the end of the day- maybe 9:30 or 10pm.

Just like that, Harper switched to four hours. We've had three days and two nights now and it's been going really well. The first night Harper woke up a little, but probably about what she usually does. I think I was just extra alert expecting something. She has even done well with a busy day and several naps in her car seat. I keep her up a little longer (closer to two hours) and she seems to go down to sleep a little easier because of it. She also sleeps harder and I haven't had a problem with her waking up early. And, when she eats, she eats really well. Yeah!

It's nice to feel more easy-going and confident about these transitions this time around. Seeing the big picture of where we're headed, and knowing that one nap, one feeding, one day wasn't going to ruin everything makes things easier. I should state, for the record, that Z changed to a four hour feeding schedule without any problems. It was really me who was full of anxiety about it. So, my lesson for today is that sometimes change is easy and maybe I shouldn't always expect the worst.

Un. Real.

I put a sign on my door today during nap time: "Do not ring doorbell. Baby sleeping." This is more for me and Z than for Harper, but you know...
Anyway, two young women salespeople stopped by and knocked. LOUDLY. I cringed in my chair while feeding Harper and waited for Z to wake up (he didn't, praise the Lord). Then, apparently in retribution for me not answering the door, they rang the doorbell and hurried off giggling.
If I didn't have an infant attached to my boob, I swear I would have run down the street yelling at them.

Okay, I have anger issues.

Summer Fun

A few pictures to show the summer has been more than meltdowns in public places.

Discipline in Difficult Situations

Today Z and Harper and I met Auntie J and her little boy at Disneyland. We got passes. I know. I never thought I would...but here I am going to Disneyland in the summer heat. I could only do it with a good friend for help and support.

John and I had thought through discipline with Z at Disneyland. Z has to ride in a stroller for some of it and stay with us at all times. This can be very challenging in the most typical and subdued locales, let alone a stimulus stampede of a place like Disneyland. So, we spent a lot of time explaining expectations with Z and even did a trial run where we planned on leaving if Z behaved badly- like a throw-away trip for teaching purposes. Naturally on that trip, Z behaved very well.

So today I had my first "opportunity" to discipline Z at Disneyland. Let me just say that this is pretty much my worst nightmare for going places with Z. We were waiting in line on our very first ride and I had a snack for Z. He wanted to hold the bag of snacks and I said no because I didn't want cereal spilling everywhere. He got very upset about it and started to throw a tantrum. I should have seen a big meltdown possibility because he was pretty overwhelmed by everything. I wouldn't have chosen to have the battle over such a small thing if I knew it was going to be such an issue. Oh well... once I said no, I didn't want to give in to the tantrum. So, the tantrum turned into a meltdown with me dragging Z by the arm to keep him moving in line while I have Harper strapped to my chest in a carrier. Night. Mare.

I felt trapped not knowing whether to, or how to, exit the line. I bent over and spanked Z telling him his behavior was unacceptable. In retrospect, I can see how my spanking him was really aiming for behavior modification, not heart modification. I just wanted him to stop throwing a fit. I usually don't spank him in public because a) I want to respect his privacy and dignity as a person, and b) spanking is not everyone's idea of discipline and I don't need Child Services called on us. So, I can see how the spanking actually made things worse because Z really gets stubborn and angry when I discipline him in anger or without our usual protocol (explaining what he did wrong, telling him how many spankings, asking him to say sorry, hug and me telling him I forgive him).

So, after a few more minutes of tantrum and dragging by the arm, we finally make it to the front of the line and I can see an exit. I pick Z up (awkwardly because Harper is still strapped to me and crying herself by this point) and almost push people out of my way to get out of the line. We found a bench and I told Z he was on time-out. He sat there and calmed down while I also sat there and cooled off (while feeding Harper). After five minutes or so, I was able to calmly explain to him what he did wrong and ask him to say sorry. Now that the power struggle and chaotic surroundings were gone, and we were both calm, he very quickly said, "sorry, Mama frowing tatrum."

Boy. Big learning experience. There are no shortcuts to discipline. Always know where the exits are. Pick your battles. And teaching my child to obey and respect me must always come before whatever else is going on- from grocery shopping to, yes, even a fun ride at Disneyland.

Evolution of A Room

How do you fit two kids in one room? Can you have two kids in a two bedroom house? Am I going to go crazy?
Storage. Yes. Not sure yet.

So far those are the answers to those questions I had when we first knew we would be having two kids. I obsessed about organization and storage in the early months of pregnancy and found some fine solutions for fitting extra storage into one room. This weekend, we finally finished setting up for Harper to share a room with Z. She has not yet slept in the bed yet but at least we're ready for it (physically, not necessarily mentally).

Here's how the transition went. We moved the big bookcase (filled with John and my books) into our bedroom and moved a little bookcase into the kids room. This will give extra space for the kids' books and toys. Getting the toys and crates off of the floor made room for Harper's crib.

Old Room (Z only)



New Room (Z and Harper)




Extra Storage
Storage, storage, storage. This is key.



I added a door-hanging organizer on the back of the door to contain all of those little toys and stuffed animals. I also added organizers in the closet for socks, shoes, hats, etc. The crates below in the closet are for clothes, books and toys (I hide some away in here to keep the clutter down and have some "new" toys to cycle through). One of the hardest things to manage is all of the baby clothes. Especially in the first year, the amount of clothes babies go through is phenomenal. About every 2-3 months, I try to sort through Harper's clothes and put the outgrown ones away and pull the new clothes out. That's what those gift bags (outgrown) and one of the crates (new) contain. I have a gift bag ready to go somewhere (giveaway or hand-me-down) and I just fill it up until it's full, then pass it along.

The next step is to have Harper actually sleep in the room with Z. Z is SO excited about it, but I'm waiting as long as I can. You can be sure I'll be posting when we make that change. :)

Dropping a Feeding

After waiting a while to see if Harper was ready to go to a four hour schedule, I decided to drop her "dream feed" first while also lengthening the time between feedings. She did start to go a little longer in the morning (perhaps a dark sheet I drape over the bassinet helped a little?) and I figured I would just try moving the dream feed back a little at a time and see if it affected her morning wake-up at all. I moved her feeding from 10:30pm back to 10 and then 9:30 and then 9pm. It really didn't change the time she woke up in the morning, so I figured she was ready. So, here it is:

Previous Schedule	Current Schedule (at 4 1/2 months)
7am	7am -breastfeed & pump extra for her evening bottle
10am	10:30am
1pm	2/2:30pm
4pm	5:30pm -she sleeps well at this time but I didn't want to feed her at 6pm when I'm trying to get dinner ready
7pm- bottle;8:30-pump	8:30pm- bottle
10pm	9pm- pump

Part of what pushed me to switch was that I found it was getting harder and harder to squeeze in that sixth feeding. She continues to stay awake for an hour and a half, sometimes a little more. So, over the day, each feeding would get pushed a little later until I was feeding her the bottle at 7:30pm or even 8pm and then again only a couple hours later. I was staying up too late to try to make time between those last two feedings. Also, I didn't think Harper could make it four hours between every feeding and, for convenience, I didn't want feedings to fall at certain times. So, this is where I landed.

The downside of the new schedule is a much smaller window of opportunity for my own nap. Sigh. It was bound to happen. If I'm lucky I can still squeak in a 15-30 minute nap if Z goes down early and Harper doesn't wake up right at 2pm. Oh well, all the more reason for me to go to bed early...like now.