Day Seven

Friday
Today was pretty easy because it's the day my Mom watches the kids and I go to work. I took off early for some alone time, which was nice. But I have to say I'm feeling pretty worn out. I had to pray and gear myself up for going to my Mom's house to pick up the kids. Z usually starts to act up right when I get to my Mom's but today he was tired so he was pretty good. I got the kids in bed early tonight because they were both so tired, but now Harper is crying and Z is reading a book. It feels harder when there's no one else here in the house.

-10 minutes later-
Aaah. Harper's finally asleep.

Overall, I guess I should be really proud and thankful we all made it through this week with some fun moments (and a few not so great moments). Again, I'm so, so thankful I don't have to do the single parent thing all of the time. But it's funny how you kind of just suck it up and do it because there is no other option. I wonder if sometimes I call John during the day about some difficulty because it is a way to feel like someone out there knows that my job is hard. This week I prayed a lot and really had to rely on God to "see" me.
This makes me think of Hagar, who after being mistreated by Sarai, runs away into the desert. She is pregnant with no where to go and no one to take care of her. God speaks to her directly and tells her that she is part of His plan. "She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: "You are the God who sees me," for she said, "I have now seen the One who sees me." (Genesis 16:13) I love this idea that God SEES me. He knows me better than I know myself and even when I can only pray, "God help me," He can, and does, help me better than anyone else. I hope I can take that truth into the weeks and years to come: that I am not flying solo ever and God is the best co-parent, spouse, friend there is.

-Another 10 minutes later-
Z is asleep!! 8:25pm. Yipee!